Wife shares her nightly routine, which she calls a turning point in the relationship.

A wife shares a three-hour nightly routine that she and her husband have incorporated into their evenings that she believes has strengthened their marriage. A nightly routine involves setting aside three hours of your time, each of which is dedicated to household chores, your spouse, and yourself.

Marriages can be challenging at times, and taking the time to focus on making it better every day is the only way to improve it when times get tough.

A wife says the nightly routine has been a complete game changer for both her and her husband in their marriage.

A wife’s three-hour nightly routine consists of setting aside time for housework, focusing on her marriage, and some time to relax. Amid the chaos of life, it’s easy to plop down on the couch after a long day and spend hours scrolling on your phone before heading to bed. It’s a habit that Rachel Higgins and her husband found themselves at home for a while.

“After our daughter went to bed, we would just lay on the couch and scroll on our phones until we got tired and went to bed,” she shared in a TikTok video.

However, the couple soon discovered that this nightly ritual had led them to a dead end. To spice up their nights and better connect with each other, Higgins and her husband implemented what they called a “three o’clock night” into their daily routine.

The wife explained that after her daughter goes to bed at 7 p.m., they begin their nightly routine with general household chores.

“The first hour is our productive time. So we start with a quick clean out of the kitchen or things that have accumulated during the day,” Higgins said. “And then we try to do something we’ve either been putting off, like cleaning the bathroom, organizing the pantry or closet, or something completely random like sharpening knives… whatever is useful for the household.”

According to a study conducted by University of Utah assistant professor Daniel Carlson, doing household chores together can be good for your marriage.

“The number of tasks shared equally makes a big difference in the quality of relationships for both men and women,” he shared a short link to the study. “It turns out that the more tasks spouses do together, the stronger their sense of equality and the more satisfied they are with their housework.”

Rachel and her husband were definitely onto something when they decided to do housework together!

couple doing housework Prostok-studio | Shutterstock

The second hour of their three-hour nightly routine is dedicated to spending time solely between the two of them.

“During this time, we put away our phones and dedicate ourselves solely to each other and our marriage,” Higgins said. They spend this hour focusing on each other and connecting on a deeper level, whether it’s showering together or playing a game together.

“Anything that will help you guys talk and chat, recap the day or just talk about plans for tomorrow or how work is going… anything that will help unite, strengthen and build your marriage“, she says.

The third and final hour is dedicated to personal time.

During this hour, the couple can do whatever they want before calling it a night and going to bed. “This is a time where you can do whatever you want for yourself without being judged,” she explained.

“So if you just want lie down on the sofa and scroll on your phone and watch TikTok, the other person can’t make any judgment on it!”

woman resting fizkes | Shutterstock

During Higgins’ hour alone, she’s usually editing her TikTok videos, reading a book, or even just coloring. Even if you’re married, everyone deserves time to themselves. In fact, taking a little time for yourself can strengthen your marriage.

Relationship psychologist John Aiken told the Sydney Herald that time spent apart during marriage “encourages each person to maintain their sense of identity while remaining a couple.”

It’s important to get to know yourself outside of marriage, and taking time for yourself allows you to a chance to miss your partner and appreciate them even more when you’re back together.

Changing your nightly routine can be difficult, especially if you’ve been sticking to the same habits for a long time.

However, when you do the same thing over and over again, it can cause anxiety in your marriage.

It never hurts to change the situation if you find that life has reached a dead end. Even the simplest changes to your daily routine can make a world of difference.

Megan Quinn is a YourTango writer who covers entertainment and news, self, love and relationships.