6 Promising Signs That an Affair Could Have Long-Term Potential, According to Psychology | Orna and Matthew Walters

Most dates are not a simple journey from first meeting to romantic engagement. And many people who date don’t have good communication skills, so their intentions and desires aren’t obvious.

Trying to figure out where things are going or if they are going anywhere at all can be confusing. So, what are the signs that your romance might have a future… and what might be the misinterpretations? And what are the promising signs of the future that you can really trust?

Here are six promising signs that mean your romance may have long-term potential:

1. You have long, deep conversations.

couple talking while sitting on the sofa Andres Ayrton | Pexels

Having deep and meaningful conversations about your life is a great way to build emotional intimacy. AND with the right personthis could be a great start to a wonderful relationship. However, there are many people who desire this type of connection but are not emotionally ready for anything more.

We had a client who was dating a man who had recently broken up. They talked every day, laughed a lot and had a great connection, but he never moved things forward. Instead, he used the situation to heal his broken heart after his divorce and feel better about himself. He simply wasn’t emotionally available for deeper commitments.

A promising sign – you survived your first battle. It is impossible to avoid conflicts and misunderstandings that happen when you spend time together. If one of you is ready to part with the first bump in the road, then nothing is serious between both of you.

However, if you both have a strong desire to clear the air, make amends, and reconnect, then the relationship has legs. Remember, conflict is inevitableand the decision to move past the conflict and establish deeper connections is a sign that the affair may become serious.

Couples who spend more time communicating report greater satisfaction and intimacy in their relationships. according to a 2022 study.

2. You text each other very often

man smiling into his phone Andrea Piacquadio | Pexels

Frequent text messages may seem promising. You wake up to a good morning message and receive checks throughout the day. It’s easy to assume that you like this person, isn’t it? The problem with text communication is that it is very convenient and does not require much effort.

You may enjoy texting each other and finding someone to spend your day with, but since it requires very little energy, it’s not a reliable sign that the fling has a real future. It’s also very easy to fill in the blanks and set a tone for text communication. This means that you filter the text message by slanting it either positively or negatively. In any case, the message itself is not received as intended.

A promising sign is that you express your emotions openly. Sharing your feelings and not just your thoughts will make you both vulnerable.

When you both openly share your feelings and express your thoughts sincerely, then things become more serious. Love requires risk and sharing your feelings can be scary. If you’re both willing to take the risk and talk about how you feel about each other, your relationship can become serious.

2015 study found that texting can complement traditional face-to-face communication and benefit relationships. For example, texting can allow people to stay connected while maintaining autonomy.

3. He showers you with attention and gifts.

Man giving gift to surprised woman Anthony Skraba | Pexels

Gifts and attention too early in the dating process could be a red flag. Some men become strong because they don’t want to be alone. He may want to overwhelm you and get you off the market, but if you haven’t met yet, he may be wasting your time. It may not be ideal for you.

Enjoy attention and appreciate gifts, but don’t mistake them for anything more. It takes time to find out if you two are suitable for each other in the long term. There is no secret shortcut or crystal ball that will show you how the two of you will face challenges together.

A promising sign is that you are getting to know each other’s friends and family. In a casual relationship, you just hang out and see each other at the last minute when it’s convenient.

A clear sign that an affair has a future is seeing each other’s friends or spending time with family. The desire to introduce each other to your inner circle is a clear sign that the other person sees a future for the two of you.

Keeping your relationship a secret or putting off introducing yourself to friends and family is a great way to keep things casual. That way, if things don’t work out, you won’t have to explain to everyone what happened. The more you participate in each other’s lives, the more serious the relationship becomes.

4. He invites you on trips and events.

couple looking at man on a hike studio khlopkabro | Pexels

If he invites you to the theater, to concerts, or weekend Enjoy your time together, but don’t think he’s serious about you just yet. Just because you spend a lot of time together doesn’t mean things are getting serious. You don’t want to just be his Plus One.

Perhaps he just wants communication. Remember to give up your friends and already planned plans to make room for his desires. There’s a big difference between a guy buying tickets to see your favorite band and a guy inviting you along because he bought two tickets months ago before you even met.

Don’t consider the hours you spend together as evidence of a future together, but instead pay attention to what happens over time.

A promising sign – he is making plans with you for the future. If he invites you on a date in advance, plans a joint vacation in advance, or goes on a trip together, it means the relationship is becoming serious.

Casual relationships are about the present moment. When you start making long-term plans, you can have a future together.

According to a recent study, couples who do new, interesting, challenging and exciting things together while on vacation report higher romantic passion and physical intimacy after the vacation. The study was published in the journal Annals of Tourism Research Empirical Insights. The experience of self-expansion occurs in a variety of ways and in situations that do not necessarily have to be challenging, expensive, or difficult, as long as new, exciting, adventurous, romantic, and humorous experiences suffice.

5. You feel jealous at the thought of him being with someone else.

jealous young woman Budgeron Bach | Pexels

Some people think that jealousy means that their heart is invested in them. If you’re giving in to the green-eyed monster, wondering who he’s with, who he’s texting, and worrying about your attractive co-worker, it’s more a sign of insecurity than budding romance.

Jealousy means you’re afraid you will lose love. If you come from a place of fear, love has no room to blossom. Review your relationship history to see if this is a pattern for you, and if not, you may discover that he was hiding something from you, and your intuition is right. In any case, feelings of jealousy are not a sign that your relationship is becoming more serious.

A promising sign – you think about each other’s happiness. Casual relationships are often characterized by unbalanced dynamics. One person is more interested, while another just wants it to be comfortable. Relationships are not always comfortable, they require compromise and compassion.

One sign that an affair has a future is that you each think about the other person’s happiness. You are both willing to see each other’s points of view and make adjustments in your behavior. In a casual relationship, you will move on when the relationship is no longer easy or comfortable.

Jealousy can be a sign of a healthy relationship as it can indicate deep love for your partner and a desire to protect your union. according to research from the University of Texas at Arlington. However, jealousy can also lead to anxiety, insecurity and a lack of trust.

6. There is both emotional and physical intimacy.

Chermiti Mohamed | Pexels

The incredible chemistry in the early stages of a relationship will flood your body with feel-good hormones. So stay grounded and keep your cool – maybe this isn’t true love.

Chemistry and attraction are necessary ingredients for a long-term relationship, but they alone do not indicate the ideal match for lasting love. There are many factors to consider, and the most important thing is that you two share the same values (which has nothing to do with you being hot for each other).

A promising sign – there is emotional as well as physical intimacy. Do you put off physical intimacy until you feel strong emotional connection? Do you both have the same dreams and goals so you can bring them closer together?

Emotional and physical intimacy are the biggest predictors of relationship success as they create a deep sense of connection and trust between partners, allowing them to feel safe and supported, which ultimately contributes to greater relationship satisfaction and stability. Essentially, couples feel more connected and fulfilled when both forms of intimacy are present. study published by the American Psychological Association.

Orna and Matthew Walters are soulmate coaches who were guest experts on Bravo’s Millionaire Matchmaker. They are the authors of a free e-book, 7 steps to unity of souls.