6 Reasons It’s Not Your Fault You’re Having a Difficulty Staying Motivated

Motivation is, simply put, the reason why you do something. You may be motivated because you want a certain outcome or reward. Or you may be motivated by a desire to avoid something unpleasant.

But why do people sometimes think they want something but don’t do what it takes to get it? What happened to their “motivation”?

Here are some reasons why people don’t achieve their goals:

Compartmentalization
Negation
Inattention due to ADD/ADHD
Fear
It’s unclear what they really want

Why is it so hard to stay motivated?

Compartmentalization

If you have a habit of compartmentalizing everything, you may draw arbitrary lines in your life or mind. This can cause you to completely lose focus on one area of your life while focusing on another.

If this is a problem for you, it is important to do something to bridge the gap. This might look like keeping all your goals in one place where you can see them, creating ways of working and thinking that benefit multiple areas your whole life all at once or by using a coach to help you focus on what’s important.

Negation

They look at the camera with their hand on their chin Andreonegin via Shutterstock

With separation comes denial. We may deny how inaction affects us, or we may deny that we ever achieved a goal. One way to deal with denial is to intensify the feelings associated with not doing what we said we wanted to do. We might ask ourselves: Is it true that I am satisfied that I have not achieved this goal?

ADHD and other distractions

Many people with ADHD also have difficulty with motivation, as shown in research conducted
Mira Eliza Glaser Holt and Eva Langvik. They get distracted. One thing leads to other things and before you know it, you’ve lost your way. Often you find it difficult to know which foot to put on first. Perhaps you are so used to getting off track that you simply refuse to start. In this case, self-help books for ADHD can be a great resource to help you increase your motivation.

Fear

If you’ve ever stopped yourself from doing something or dreaming because of fear, you know how exhausting it can be. Many other factors that contribute to loss of motivation are related to fear, such as: studied by psychologist Rene Misslin. The best thing you can do when you feel like fear is holding you back is to figure out why you’re afraid and then support yourself despite the fear.

Realizing that this is not exactly what you want

Sometimes the reason you don’t have the motivation to do something is because you thought you wanted to. this is not really what you want. It can be difficult to know if this is true, but one of the surest ways to find out is to first work on other reasons for loss of motivation. Then, if you still don’t feel motivated, it’s time to ask yourself if what you set as your goal is what you want after all.

How to stay motivated

Recognize your progress
Recognize that undesirable results may be part of the process.
Reward yourself
Evaluate your goals regularly to keep them current.
Delegate things that destroy your motivation
Monitor your emotional state

It’s easy to lose motivation on big projects, especially ones that don’t bring immediate results. It is important to celebrate your progress along this path and recognize your small successes to stay motivated for the next step in achieving your goal.

While I often believe that negative consequences are best avoided, they can sometimes help some people stay on track. If there is something you want to avoid, remind yourself that your current actions are taking you away from it.

Similar to recognizing your progress every step of the way, rewarding yourself for achieving goals will help you stay motivated, as shown in studying self-reward and personal motivation in European Economic Review.

She smiles at the camera Boulevard via Shutterstock

If you allow your goals to become stale, your focus and motivation may become lost. What seemed like an exciting goal 10 years ago may not be of much interest now. Often the target’s lifespan is much shorter. Set aside time to regularly create and evaluate your goals.

If achieving your goal means you’ll have to do a lot of things you don’t like, it may make sense to delegate your tasks to people who want to do them rather than trying to do it yourself.

Finally, it is very important to ensure that you keep up with your personal development. By doing this, you clear out the accumulated emotional residue that is preventing you from moving forward easily.

Dr. Kate Siner is a teacher, mentor, spiritual director, and author who has appeared on NBC, ABC, Fox, and other major television networks on spiritual and personal development. She has appeared on WPRO, MX Talk of the Town, Consciousness Network and TalkStream Radio.