Miss Manners: When my drunk friend ‘reminds’ me of my disability it’s unpleasant

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I know an elderly couple, and the woman often “reminds” me that I am disabled. I believe that she is simply reminding herself of my status to keep her friends in mind, but this is unkind.

She will hint that I nap most of the time during the day (which is what I do when I have a migraine). I already feel very guilty being at home on disability while my husband works full time.

Additionally, there is over a 50% chance that she will be bugged every time she communicates with me. Alcoholism makes her forgetful, but she seems stuck in the habit of publicly counting my losses, and I don’t want to spend time with her.

I told her that true friends don’t talk about our worries and illnesses. Should I just tell her not to call me when she was drinking that day?

GENTLE READER: Or someday, Miss Manners would think.

The odds are more than 50% in your favor and you don’t have to put up with a friend who insults you. You don’t have to answer her calls. If she asks, you can explain that your schedule has changed and you are usually unavailable.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners on her website. www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or by mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndicate, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.